A Collection of Forwarded Emails
 

Fw: Obituary

My parents told me about Mr. Common Sense early in my life and told me I would do well to call on him when making decisions. It seems he was always around in my early years but less and less as time passed by until today I read his obituary. Please join me in a [...]

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Fw: Protection

TWENTY-ONE THINGS YOUR BURGLAR WON’T TELL YOU: I was particularly interested in the part about the wasp spray… 1. Of course I look familiar. I was here just last week cleaning your carpets, painting your shutters, or delivering your new refrigerator. 2. Hey, thanks for letting me use the bathroom when I was working in your [...]

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Fw: Not Funny!

This is too true to be funny. The next time you hear a politician use the Word ‘billion’ in a casual manner, think about Whether you want the ‘politicians’ spending YOUR tax money. A billion is a difficult number to comprehend, But one advertising agency did a good job of Putting that figure into some [...]

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Fw: Thanksgiving Divorce

February 2nd, 2009 Holidays
Fw: Thanksgiving Divorce

Thanksgiving Divorce

A man in Jacksonville calls his son in San Diego two days before Thanksgiving and says, ‘I hate to ruin your day, but I have to te ll you that your mother and I are divorcing. Forty-five years of misery is enough.

‘Pop, what are you talking about?’ the son screams.

We can’t stand the sight of each other any longer,’ the father says. We’re sick of each other, and I’m sick of talking about this, so you call your sister in Denver and tell her.’

Frantic, the son calls his sister, who explodes on the phone. ‘Like heck they’re getting divorced,’ she shouts, ‘I’ll take care of this.’

She calls Jacksonville immediately, and screams at her father, ‘You are NOT getting divorced. Don’t do a single thing until I get there. I’m calling my brother back, and we’ll both be there tomorrow. Until then, don’t do a thing. DO YOU HEAR ME?’ and hangs up.

The old man hangs up the phone and turns to his wife. ‘Okay.’ he says, ‘They’re coming for Thanksgiving and paying their own way.

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